whom I ought to be yesterday

the time once spent thinking about what I was going to be,

drained, and wrung itself into a thousand,

minerals,

spreading diseased thoughts,

jealousy,

a competitive nature, ran it’s course,

and delve into the los angeles river,

along with the ideology that,

losers never win.

today isn’t going to be like that day,

today isn’t yesterday,

today is to be a day, unlike yesterday,

unlike ambition, there is no anxiety for success,

no risk,

nor rise,

nor fall,

a rainfall that’s certain to happen,

and a romance that’s certain an offspring,

letting nature run it’s course,

brought new identity to an already beautiful one,

the hope that we never change our view upon an old scenery,

depends on what we thought ourselves to be yesterday,

shall we grow,

shall we grow,

shall we?

beloved

beloved sun drenched shoulder blades,
you rummage in my pockets, looking for the note that’ll set you free.
and everything will make sense, much after it is found,
and the waves we’ll feel,
and the waves will disappear,
an invisible force,
makes it’s way into our bodies,
and we move like the waves do,
and we reach further into our pockets,
and we drown deeper in through the outside of ourselves tonight.

Outings

Letting the inside, fully take-outside of you.
From what we are.
and what we’ve been through.

the complexity of our images,
allure the whole new feeling,
that we won’t fight away without the night by our side.

and when we’ve given enough thought to our lives about where we’ve been,
spending those times with people and places and scenarios upon scenarios.

We run to escape the times.

Yet the anti still chases my mind through the light.
Stuck, is what it feels like.
But that’s not what I am.

Release

Obsession, obliterated the constraints. 
Solitude, fastened the catalyst.The catalyst is my release,
And in isolation,
The beloved and cursed,
behaves and warmly insulates me,
In the dance around a flame.

Alleviate, sequences that reminisce,
of an allegory that never dies.
Experiment with eyes shut,
The openness of mindlessness,
an absence of restraint,
annihilate what used to keep me here,
disconnected,
manic depression is a parenthetic severity with nothing to recollect,
with a home – at rest – I’ll never forget.